It still shocks (and mostly just disappoints) me how SHOCKED people are when I tell them that it is 100% legal to be fired simply for being gay.
They look at me like I’m lying and say things like “nooooo, that can’t be right?”.
I have been fired twice (in Ohio) for being openly gay.
I have been asked:
- to not wear my wedding ring
- Not acknowledge my wife’s existence
- To “just say you have a husband”
- To just not answer “yes” when people ask if I’m married because “you’re not REALLY married”
- To not bring my wife to the company FAMILY Christmas party
- Let people just assume we’re sisters
- Just make it easier on everyone and “just say you’re divorced”
These were not requests made from some Mom and Pop shop, I was a corporate executive for a large chain of high volume restaurants. My boss was the Director of Human Resources, and she would walk into my office and say the most ignorant things you can imagine.
People in America need to be educated on the reality that is life as a gay person in this country.
It’s not all gay pride parades and appletinis.
We need a leg to stand on.
We need people to wake up and educate themselves on the rights we are denied.
We need people…gay, straight, and in between, to open their eyes, stop ignoring what doesn’t directly effect them, and educate themselves.
(The content here, the link above, and everything it links out to are extremely triggering. Proceed with caution and take care of yourself.)
By now you’ve probably heard about this, but maybe you haven’t - there’s a thread on Reddit in which people who have raped other people are coming forth and sharing their stories, namely explaining why they did it.
Most of the posts are really disturbing accounts of how “hormones took over” or “I thought she wanted it” or “I knew I wouldn’t get caught” and the usual phrases that get tossed around in spaces where the culture reeks of rape apologism. More disturbing, though, is how so many people are being praised for being “brave enough” to tell their stories and congratulated for backing off and not raping someone when they could have. Then again, this isn’t terribly surprising, as Reddit isn’t exactly the most pro-woman site in the world.
The link I’ve posted above is Jezebel’s take on the issue. You may have read other responses to the posts online and you may certainly have your own opinions that don’t align with anything you’ve read before. Either way, I’m sure we can all agree that it’s pretty disturbing to read some of the things that have been posted.
What do we do with this? How do we use this outpouring of confessions to further the conversation on rape culture? How can we learn from this? There’s so much to process here, and I really want to hear your thoughts. What do we do now?
While I don’t necessarily buy that all of those “rape” stories are even true - in fact, I think a lot of them are bullshit, considering there is nothing stopping people from lying or just making shit up for the sake of it - if they are true, then this is a rare view inside the sick mind’s of rapists… particularly rapists who got away with it.
I’m not a psychologist by any stretch, but understanding the mind of a rapist could certainly help in combating rape culture.
- Sen. Jack Reed (D-RI)
- Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV)
- Democratic House Whip Steny Hoyer (D-MD)
- Former Sen. Bob Kerrey (D-NE)
- Illinois Gov. Pat Quinn (D)
- House Assistant Minority Leader James Clyburn (D-SC)
WOAH. House Speaker John Boehner made it clear at his weekly press conference today that he disagrees with President Obama on the issue of gay marriage, and he would not answer the question: Do you feel that gay marriage is a civil rights issue? When asked, Boehner responded: ”I believe that marriage is the union of one man and one woman, and the president and the democrats can talk about all this all they want.” He added, “The fact is the American people are focused on our economy, and they’re asking the question: Where are the jobs?”
(Via AP YouTube)
Gay presidential candidate Fred Karger has a message. The longtime political advisor knows he stands no chance of becoming the Republican nominee, but he wants to let others know it’s OK to be gay and to aim high in life.
Photo: Fred Karger spent nearly 30 years as a campaign advisor to several of California’s top Republicans and served as an election strategist for corporate clients, including cigarette maker Philip Morris. Credit: Bret Hartman / For The Times